Pity Party of One

So I have no idea what's gotten into me lately. In two weeks, I'm going to be 26. Twenty-six. I haven't had a problem turning any age until now. I thought I would be weirded out when I turned 25 because I could never picture my life past it but I had no problem. I'm wondering if that's why I'm so ..... hesitant? anxious? unsure? completely against? .... turning 26. It means that 25 has come and gone and honestly, I have no idea what I want my life to look like. I have goals and dreams but for as long as I could remember, I could never picture my life past 25. I have no idea what that means but it kind of freaks me out. So, in two weeks, I'm going to be old. As I think about my life and everything I've done so far, I've accomplished a lot and I'm happy with where I'm headed career wise. Seriously, I cannot even wait to start my internship and my career after that. But I had better hopes for my personal life, I guess. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm so happy to be out of my last relationship. It was incredibly unhealthy and NO ONE deserves to be treated that way. I'm sorry that I stayed in it for so long but hindsight is always 20/20. I'll be honest though, I'm ready to settle down. But I'm an introvert and I don't go out and meet new people. It's terrifying .... SO .... if I don't go out and meet new people, how am I supposed to find someone? Ugh. I just thought everything would be different.
So with my birthday coming around the corner, I feel that it's time that maybe I take action. I deserve a great guy and a great guy deserves me. I've already said that I'm not settling and I won't. But is it too much to ask for maybe a date for my birthday? For a couple hours to go out and forget about the chaos that is my life? I'm tired of being stalked and harrassed. I would like to have a couple hours - dinner and a movie with a nice guy. Seriously. We'll see if I get some guts as it gets closer .....